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Dec. 1st, 2009

  • 5:19 AM
Hey you, drama queen. You know, for a long time we didn't have any sort of drama in our game. Nothing that spread around, at least. And then something must have crawled up your ass and died there, because it was suddenly one thing after another.

There's so many reasons you suck. )

tl;dr- You bitch and moan too much over petty, petty things. Cut it the fuck out.


Edited to fix some typos.





Video game time! Those villains at Steam had a special on the game "Borderlands," and their sale price plus peer pressure got the better of me, and I bit. If nothing else, it was interesting to see another post-apocalyptic game and put it through its paces (for a few hours, anyway). So what does "Borderlands" hold for the discerning civilization-in-ruins aficionado?

It's got the same basic gray/brown look as "Fallout" for the most part. It looks as if a society has come and gone and left behind mutant monsters and psychopathic humans who wear lots of leather and like their guns a little too much. Which would have a bit more kick, story-wise, if it didn't take place on another planet. If you thought "Fallout 3" had too much RPG and not enough FPS, then "Borderlands" has got you covered. You get to level up, gaining new powers and skills, and use of certain weapons increases your proficiency with them, which is a nice mechanic. However, the emphasis is on pointing your gun and pulling the trigger. There are no dialogue trees, just missions to go blow someone up and hopefully get some new kind of gun in the process. Which isn't bad, don't get me wrong; gameplay is quite satisfying in this regard. Just don't look for a lot of deep thinking to go with your sniper rifle. :)

You also get vehicular combat/travel, some interesting wasteland to look at, and characters that manage to combine character with caricature in a pleasing way. I've heard there are issues with the multiplayer (though I haven't tried it yet) as well as some of the nuts-and-bolts of the game, but in the end, it's still a decent amount of mindless fun.

Speaking of dark futures, there's talk that Judge Dredd will get another shot at the silver screen. I must admit to having less Dredd in my geek resume than I'd like. I saw the Stallone film (and wasn't enthused), and I later heard that the movie had problems due to "Robocop" adopting a lot of the tone and look of Dredd's character. From what I've seen (and the little that's passed through my hands), it's got a load of potential, and I'd like to see it in British hands rather than American ones (especially after what happened to "Hellblazer" when it became "Constantine" starring Keanu Reeves). And let me also put out the desire to see the Judge Dredd Pinball Game put back in arcades. The Judge also made an appearance in this list of the best and worst future cops and vehicles.

And closing out this sci-fi romp, the even-tempered Harlan Ellison expresses interest in being in on J.J. Abrams' "Star Trek 2," complete with mention of the feud with Roddenberry and aplomb at doubters that he'd be right for the project. He could always try to get a gig with the upcoming remake of 'The Black Hole' as a science adviser.

And speaking of black holes:

- First up, from a little-seen edit of "Star Wars," it's revealed that it took Obi-Wan Kenobi several tries to finally distract those stormtroopers near the tractor beam controls.
- This should give everyone their dose of unbearable cute for the next month: A kitten making "jazz hands."
- Bring a lot of spare time to the oddly-named smartass dot com, especially if you click the "games" link on the left. There are emulators of DOS and old console game systems to be had, coded (I believe) in Java. There area also links to first-run movies, though I'd steer clear of those, especially at work and/or if you fear a visit from the MPAA.
- Any time left? Bring along your love of vectors and 'splosions and play Paper Cannon. Blow up the critters by landing a grenade-like cannonball right next to them.
- I have found the proper way to teach science: Use a periodic table made of cupcakes.
- And I have found the proper way to teach art: Arcade expressionism.
- Here's a list of some of the most bizarre super-powers in comics, which earns my respect by not having the majority of them come from "The Legion of Super Heroes."
- We close with Shrink It, a game where you shrink objects by clicking and enlarging others by holding "space" and clicking (you need to have "mass" available to do this, however). Your goal is to get the blue shape into the goal.

fanvid: WAITING

  • Dec. 1st, 2009 at 12:58 AM
Title: Waiting
Fandom: Star Trek 2009
Song: "Waiting"
Artist: The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Read more... )

This doesn't bode well for the forthcoming Baldwin-Streep-Martin rom-com. Baldwin the Elder says his film career has been "a complete failure" and he's quitting in 2012.

Confirming last summer's Playboy interview, where he said he'd retire from acting in 2012, Alec Baldwin has now told Men's Journal that "I don't have any interest in acting anymore," and considers himself a failure:

I consider my entire movie career a complete failure. The goal of movie-making is to star in a film where your performance drives the film, and the film is either a soaring critical or commercial success, and I never had that.

Also, he never re-watches The Hunt for Red October. (Because its $200M worldwide box office intake was not "soaring" enough?)

And now, the movies I've been in, I never give them a moment's thought. Every movie I've ever been in, I just avoid.

Oh, cheer up, Alec! It could be worse. You could've been in Half-Baked or Forgetting Sarah Marshall or Attack of the 50-Ft Woman. (Actually, that last one sounds kind of good.) [Reuters]


Once upon a midnight dreary, I awoke from my eternal slumber of the damned to partake in a search for a Harry Potter RP. Your generation-spanning time travel game didn't appear too bad, but upon closer inspection I found myself aghast.

Snape has a granddaughter? A perky Japanese* schoolgirl granddaughter? I realize not everyone keeps track of the dead like I, but you do realize he was killed by a snake before he ever got a chance to know the touch of a woman had the opportunity to procreate, right?

Well, that's not terribly promising, but I suppose you could be trying to make it an AU. Perhaps I am being harsh, judging an entire game on the slightly cringeworthy concept of one single character. It is a little cruel for me to assume all cutesy Japanese girls who happen to be descendents of a preexisting character for no apparent reason are a sign of inherent badness or bizarre weeaboo influence (though I do wonder how anyone in the gloomy Snape family that now apparently exists could even BE cutesy). Maybe if I read her full profile, I'll see that she's a perfectly balanced character and I shouldn't be judgemental.

...Wait just a moment there.

She's a sixteen-year-old animagus, which is a skill that's extremely difficult to learn as well as being very rare in canon? She was inexplicably attacked by a werewolf once on Hogwarts grounds, and the player's other character slept with one**? You casually mention that she's "killed before" and then don't even consider the idea of a teenage student murdering people (in a time of peace, mind you) noteworthy enough to elaborate on further? All of Little Japanese Snape's characters live in a mythical place known as "Scotland, London"? And this player is a mod?

Oh dear. This may be too frightening even for myself. I suppose my dreaded search continues.

*Well, half-Japanese, technically, but seeing as she has a Japanese idol as a PB, listens to J-pop, loves cherry blossoms, and doesn't seem to have a single thing to do with the European side of her family including a backstory stating that she inherited the "Asian background" instead, I believe the argument still stands.

**I am assuming this accummulates into a plot where, gasp, the schoolgrounds sex werewolf is the same person as the schoolgrounds attack werewolf!, but there are roughly ten characters in the game so far and absolutely none of them are werewolves, so I suppose we are just to assume that werewolves are quite commonly wandering about at Hogwarts, deflowering some maidens and mauling others. However, unless Little Japanese Snape's hiding something, these werewolves apparently are either very bad at getting a helpless preteen's arm in their mouths or they don't pass on lycanthropy. I suppose she wouldn't even need it though, since she's an animagus who can willingly transform into a wolf whenever she damn well pleases. It's awful convenient that she gets to be attacked by a wolf and then turn into one, but not have to deal with all that tedious derangement and sudden bouts of uncontrollable mauling.

Hugh "Skip" McGee III has a rumored $25 million salary at Barclays, and he finds lefties and lesbians just sickening. In an epic letter to the board of his son's school, he implores the "silent majority" to strike back.

Obtained by Dealbreaker, the letter concerns McGee's son, John Edward, who attends Houston's Kinkaid School, wanted to wear cheerleader costumes with his football friends in a pep rally skit, but were barred from performing due to "negative gender stereotyping."

Entitled "The Tipping Point," McGee's letter begins with a single violin playing the world's saddest melody, Ballad of the Rich White Guy Who Takes Himself Entirely Too Seriously:

I am writing to you today with a heavy heart but also with a strong sense of obligation. I am sad that things have gotten to the point they have at Kinkaid but feel I must speak up on behalf of the "silent majority" before the situation gets to a point of no return. ... I submit to you that the values, methods, beliefs and actions of the current Administration are not in synch [sic] with those of the majority ... So this letter is about much more than a cancelled [sic] pep rally-it's about taking back control of the Kinkaid School. [emphasis mine, as it will be for the whole post]

What follows is a three-part, bullet-pointed explanation of the new white man's burden: getting subversives fired from your kid's prep school. His rationale includes "the parent whisper circuit," "a gay female coach," and the time a "leftist" teacher made his son cry.

In the first section, entitled "The Catalyst (see attachment 1—my email to Don North the afternoon of the pep rally)," McGee lays out the myriad wrongs associated with barring his son from performing a funny dance in a dress in front of the school. The unjust harshing of John Ed's mellow may have been part of an elaborate vendetta perpetrated by student president Andrew Edison, who "had previous issues with football players" and—J'accuse!—once distributed a video of himself in drag, too:

The real instigator, though, is "The Teacher," Ms. Leslie Lovett, who apparently led the anti-skit battle. Lovett "is regularly ranked among the least desired teachers (at least on the parent "whisper circuit")." Her class is "leftist invective" of anti-i-banking propaganda. Also, she hates football and doesn't know her place:

Last year, she commented to an 11th grade history class including my son
that somehow both Lehman and Barclays made a bunch of money on the Lehman
bankruptcy, and that all investment bankers were "sleazeballs" and dishonest. With tears in his eyes, John Ed called her out in front of the class and said his dad worked for Lehman Brothers and had been working around the clock trying to save 11,000 jobs and that she had absolutely no idea what she was talking about.

...Last year, Ms. Lovett suggested that Homecoming should be at a girls' field hockey game rather than at a football game. She also complained that there were no women on the football team and poked her nose into the yearbook with nonsense issues that she has no business raising.

Look, Skip: I get that you're sad about Lehman. But when everyone knows you get a 7-figure paycheck every month, maybe don't complain about how emotionally difficult it was for you to steer 11,000 people's job losses, not to mention setting off the financial collapse that sent the whole world into economic freefall and bankrupted entire nations. We really don't feel that bad for you. That said, the image of a Lehman exec's teenage son blinking back tears of confused rage, shame, and filial protectiveness makes for a somewhat fascinating tableau on the concept of "inheritance."

In his "Conclusion," McGee expands his disgust with Ms. Lovett to include all teachers who care about "diversity" and are total buzz kills:

What happened to our ability to laugh at ourselves and have fun? What happened to common sense and good judgment? Why is a married, heterosexual coach considered an oddity at Kinkaid? Why is a gay female coach telling high school girls on her team that she was disappointed in them for belonging to the spirit club (SOK) and that by doing so they are just pandering to the football team?

My personal favorite part of the letter is when McGee explains that the case of the party-pooped pep rally is actually the story of America:

The number of parents who have been talking about this particular pep rally is enormous. It is not because they care about football or pep rallies, it is because they have all encountered the same issues in some form or fashion. We have lost our way.

McGee closes by reminding everyone that his eldest daughter Katie "is now a senior at Princeton," so he knows a thing or two about kids and education. Today's battle, though, is not about Katie. Nor is it about John Ed. It's about the future: little Lizzy McGee, a wee eighth grader whose walks into the light of tomorrow with heavy feat, not because of lefty teachers and P.C. police all up in your grill—but because her father, Hugh "Skip" McGee III, is really embarrassing

Read Skip's four-page masterpiece masterpiece at Dealbreaker.
[DealBreaker] [The Daily Beast]


Are you ready to be entertained by a behemoth? General Electric is on the brink of selling NBC Universal to Comcast—a deal that will create one of the nation's largest entertainment companies and make everyone the same everywhere.

General Electric—which owns 80% of NBC Universal—just reached an agreement to buy French conglomerate Vivendi's 20% stake in the company for $5.8 billion. This will allow GE to sell NBC in turn to cable TV provider Comcast. (Very confusing.) If regulators approve the NBC deal, Comcast will boast a double threat of content production and distribution with which it will squelch all opposition and force-feed The Office reruns to the American populace until we are witless, sitcom-dazed zombies at their beck and call. At least that's what some concerned media activists say will happen. (Doesn't sound so bad, honestly.) [THR]

Alec Baldwin has just announced he's quitting acting for, like the sixth time or something. Baldwin told Men's Journal he is planning on retiring March 2010, when his "30 Rock" contract runs out. But The Wrap points out he's said this many times before, and here he is! Plus, his new corporate overlords at NBC/Comcast/Evilcorp will probably implant a chip in his brain that makes him want to act forever. [THR]

Peter Jackson's two-part "Hobbit" is being delayed until 2012 because of delays in writing and casting. I think I speak for nerds everywhere when I say: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO [shakes fist angrily at computer screen while flecks of spittle fall to the crumb-strewn floor of his parents' basement.] [The Wrap]

•BREAKING: Nicole Richie had an idea! (It was for an ABC sitcom that will "feature Richie as a professional woman with complicated family relationships and struggling to figure out what role she'll take as her life and her family evolve.")[Variety]

•By the time you read this the White House Crashers will probably have already appeared on the "Today Show" to present their side of the story. So jealous of you, future! [LAT]

•Kathryn Beglow's Hurt Locker has won "Best Picture" at the Gotham Independent Film Awards. We are trying to think of some adjective to describe the film in a different way than the LA Times. What is a synonym for "gritty"? [LAT]


Even if the stories and acting is uneven...

  • Nov. 30th, 2009 at 11:43 PM
Glee hits you in the gut with their show stopper numbers.

Happy Birthday!

  • Nov. 30th, 2009 at 11:42 PM
to [info]razzle

May your day have been filled with love and laughter.

Cat a Tonic

  • Nov. 30th, 2009 at 11:30 PM

Work was full of changes today, some good, some not appropriate to mention in a journal. Co-worker's 91-year-old father is doing well after heart surgery. May he live to be 120.

RadioCatLady Linda finally returned my call at about 6 pm, which is 9 pm her time (the San Mateo clinic's scheduling is done from Maryland. Go figure.) Very nice woman, explained what needed explaining, stopped explaining when I told her what I already knew. Bad news is the first opening they have is Jan. 5. The only other date is December 15, which would be perfect, but it's all booked. Maybe someone will cancel, what with the holidaze coming up and all. It's a major cashectomy, but less than what I've already spent on her, and with a 98% chance of total cure. Domino is "only" about 14, and other than the hyperthyroid ought to have a bunch more good years left.



posted by Neil
For those of you who missed it, here's the NPR "Open Mike" piece I did on audiobooks... You can listen to it here, or download it, or email it...



And here, at closer to full length, are the interviews I did with Martin Jarvis and David Sedaris. If you enjoyed the piece, they are filled with wonderful bits that didn't make it in. And the Martin Jarvis interview is practically a masterclass in how to approach doing Audiobooks.



(The strangest moment for me in the Martin Jarvis interview is when he talks about remembering the voices of teachers, and names John Branston and Dick Glynne Jones. I went to Whitgift School in Croydon, which Martin had also attended twenty years before me, and I was taught by both of them. I was in John Branston's production of Julius Caesar at the Fairfield Halls -- and was taught O-level English by Dick Glynne Jones. As he said their names, I thought "He can't be talking about the same people..." but of course, he was.)



There's a sort of interview with me, and a gallery of snapshots, over at http://www.lomography.com/magazine/lomoamigos/2009/11/30/neil-gaiman-shoots-with-the-lc-a-plus. I love the low-tech magic of the camera, and the wonderful hodgepodge nature of the shots, a mixture of art of documentary, such as the moment when a collapsing shelf deposited the contents of a make-up bag into a toilet, to Amanda's doomed attempts to make friends with sheep, or a photo that should not have come out of my goddaughters watching the DVD of Coraline with their 3D specs on...

For me, the most exciting bit is that they gave Dave McKean a camera to play with. I can't wait to see what he did.

I've grabbed a few more shots from their gallery. Here's the Queen of Sheep herself...


Maddy's friend Claire, at San Diego airport...


And here's Ivy McCloud (almost invisible, far right) and my goddaughters and their friend...



...

I was reading the book "Coraline". I finished then told my parents about it. I was wondering if this book has any religouiseness to it. I tried, but only found what you've writen so i'm hoping you can tell. Just curiose

I don't think so. Although I think people bring religious points of view to books, and read them from those perspectives.

You sounded good on NPR this morning, so good you need your own radio show.

If I sound good, it's because Maeve McGoran, my producer, and Barry Gordemer, the editor, did such a sterling job. Finding the time to make this, to do the interviews and put it all together, took months. I'd love to do more radio, for NPR or for Radio Four in the UK, but I think it will always be little one-off projects. But I loved doing it.

...

Here's one that contains a Graveyard Book spoiler:

Dear Mr. Gaiman:

How is Silas erasing Scarlett’s memory of events preceding justified in The Graveyard Book? When the reason given isn’t satisfactory, and is it?, doesn’t it become the Problem of Scarlett? You know what I mean. I've just about read the Problem of Susan from Fragile Things which was so brave of you to write or, rather, re-write.

I thought it was so god-like of Silas to do what he did at the same time so unnatural of him to. It meant a reasonably strong character like her couldn't stare reality in its face bravely and overcome it which is what fairy-tales are about, be it children's, YA's, or adult's.

Your Sandman fan,
Ahimaz.


Silas did what he did because he thought it was for the best. Whether it was the wisest thing he could have done, in the circumstances, remains to be seen.

....

Hi Neil,
I live in Naperville, IL, and I just heard about your appearance in February for the Naperville Reads program. No one around town seems to have a whole lot of information about the events so far though. I was wondering if you had more information about what you'll be doing here, and if any of the events will be open to the public? Thanks!


I don't know yet. When I get a schedule, I'll put it here, and at Where's Neil.

Hi,
Before I book flights I was wondering if you could let us know if you're doing a signing at the NZ talk, or if you plan on doing a signing elsewhere in Wellington that weekend? I'd hate to have to get back on the plane only to discover later that I'd missed out on a signing op at Arty Bees Books by mere hours...
And your Captcha anti-spam thing just asked me to write down "$2-mil manistee". I thought you should know.

Mike


I think there's a signing or two involved, but it'll be organised by the Festival (tickets to the main event at http://www.nzfestival.nzpost.co.nz/writers-and-readers/town-hall-talk-neil-gaiman (The signings normally follow the events.) I plan to go to Amanda's gig, and will probably sign afterwards to keep her company.

Hi, Neil! Are going to sign any books at UCLA on February 4th, 2010? If so,before or after the discussion? Or do can we buy signed books?

I don't believe there are signings at the UCSB or the UCLA talks. I know I've been asked to sign sheets to stick in books (or perhaps to presign books), so there will definitely be something available.

Hi Neil,

Don't know if anyone's pointed it out to you, but the postscript at the end of your article in The Writer's and Artist's Year Book has the films of Beowulf and Stardust being released in 1987!

Ooops!

Regards,

Mark


Yup. And the wonderful Chris Riddell is Paul Riddell in the text as well. Ah well. Mysterious goofs happen.

...

Finally, a message from Beth at Black Phoenix Alchemy Labs:

Would you please put up a little plug for the current Vampire sets and tees? I'd like people's winter money to go to a good cause, and we're getting to our cutoff date on orders that we can get out to people in time for Christmas. The perfume plus tarot card sets are at:

http://www.blackphoenixalchemylab.com/vampiretarot.html

And the tees are at:

http://www.blackphoenixtradingpost.com/vampiretarot-bptp.html

The Snow, Glass, Apples locket is at:

http://www.blackphoenixtradingpost.com/neilgaiman.html

We still have a few sets of Sunbird left:

http://www.blackphoenixalchemylab.com/sunbird.html

I'm happy to plug them here. They'll make great gifts. The Sunbird scent is amazing, comes with a chapbook, and is almost gone. The proceeds from the scents and tee shirts go to the CBLDF. The proceeds from the lockets and medallion go to Alzheimer's Research.

Nov. 30th, 2009

  • 10:28 PM
The Great Geek Sale

Are you a geek?

Do you want to buy geeky stuff?

Do you want to sell geeky stuff and make some pocket money for the holidaze?

Do you have fabric, shoes, patterns, books, DVD's, toys, or other things just cluttering up the place and you want to make sure they will have a good geek home?

Are you a vendor who would like one more shot at sales for the end of the year?

Place: 689 1/2 Locust Street, in the yard between 689 and 689 1/2, San Jose.

Sunday, December 6, from 11am-5pm (stuff that happens outdoors can get moved inside after dark, which is about 5:30, if people want to stick around).

Plenty of free street parking.

Cost: Nothing but your company and your stuff! However, if you plan on being around all day, I do ask that you please bring some sort of shareable food or beverage. (Plates/cups/cutlery/ice/napkins provided.)

Feel free to repost this post! While there will be some walk-up traffic from the neighborhood, the general traffic that we'll be getting will be word-of-mouth.

Earlier this month former editor Sandra Guzman sued the New York Post for being an alleged hellhole of racism and sexism. Today, a recently fired reporter filed a lawsuit claiming he was "banned" from the newsroom for being black.

Austin Fenner, a 20-year veteran reporter, was fired on November 9th, the same day as Guzman. And—if Fenner's claims are true—for the same reason: complaining about the Post publishing that infamous cartoon depicting officers shooting a chimpanzee meant to be Barack Obama. (Was it worth it, New York Post?)

The Huffington Post reports Fenner filed a 27-page complaint in court today which specifically signals out metropolitan editor Michelle Gotthelf and assignment editor Daniel Greenfield as the racists-in-chief. The lawsuit outlines a number of claims that fall just short of the sheer crazy-terribleness of Guzman's, but it's still a model example of (alleged!) racism.

Here are the worst/best parts:

The main thrust of the complaint is that minority Post staffers are subjected to "pervasive discrimination and harassment... based on their race and/or color" at the hands of their nearly all-white colleagues.

This discrimination manifested itself most blatantly in Fenner's claim that, after he criticized the chimpanzee cartoon in the blog Journal-ism, Greenfield and Gotthelf told him he couldn't enter the "Whites Only" newsroom without their permission for the five months before he was ultimately fired:

During the cartoon row, Fenner claims he also witnessed racism directed at New York Governor David Patterson, when editors refused to interview him about the cartoon:

And after Fenner publicly complained about the chimpanzee cartoon he said editors started to get sweary—and not even in a creative, hard-boiled-newspaper-editor-type way:

All this led to that fateful Nov. 9 day, when Fenner was called from an assignment in Brooklyn, ordered to give his notes to a white reporter, and fired.

The Post told the Huffington Post that Fenner's claims were "totally false and the claims of discrimination completely baseless." OK, you convinced us! Forget paywalls: The Post should charging for seminars on how to deny accusations that your organization is a seething pit of racism.


you make the rocking world go round

  • Nov. 30th, 2009 at 9:24 PM
This one is for the fat ladies:

Do you get an extra kick out of it when dudes flirt with you because it's a little "fuck you" to the dominant paradigm that they're not supposed to even be able to see you if you're over 130 lbs, or whatever it is?

I do. I totally do. Given that at this point I frequently find myself wanting to flirt with people and stopping myself because I've got silver in my hair and I'm carrying 20 extra pounds above where I used to think I was fat and while I'm okay with people not flirting back, I am stopped in my tracks by the thought of someone venting to their friends later about how gross it was. Given that? When people flirt with me first, it's a big ha! Fuck you, interesting little stores in my city I can't shop at because you don't make clothes in my size! Fuck you, TV & movies who never have actresses as fat as me! Fuck you, magazines! Fuck you ALL. You are WRONG.

Reflections on a month of stories

  • Dec. 1st, 2009 at 12:03 AM
November is almost over. It's five minutes before midnight as I begin this post. In the course of this last month I've written 30 stories for you that are all expansions of 30 stories I wrote during November of last year. I hope the expanded stories have been interesting and informative.

Along the way I've had my nose rubbed in the fact that sometimes people can do very important things and still get little note in the historical record. I'd have liked to tell you more about Venetia Burney, but very little is out there about her. Perhaps this is because of the long-held belief that a lady's name should only appear in print when she's born, debuts in society, marries, and dies. But there are also men I'd like to have written more about who've all but disappeared from the pages of history. Marine Captain Samuel Miller who led the 100 Marines who fought alongside Joshua Barney's sailors at Bladensburg would go on to serve as interim Commandant of the Marine Corps, yet today very little is known about him. I could probably dig into his service records at HQMC if I wanted to compile a more complete biography, but it surprises me that a man who once led the Corps has so little information in online Marine Corps historical sources.

Anyhow, another month of tales told. I hope you liked them.

enemas

  • Nov. 30th, 2009 at 6:50 PM
I know that a lot of people use enemas prior to having anal sex to remove feces.
I have never used one before but plan on having anal sex (for my 3rd time) soon, and wanted to use one.

My question is; how long prior to having anal sex are you supposed to use one?
an hour before?
a few hours before?
a day before?

i want to clean myself out so it will be less messy, please help!

thank you :)

Nov. 30th, 2009

  • 8:02 PM
  • 20:51 ... aftermath of a long, enjoyable day with Ami'd family in Long Beach ... Phew. myloc.me/1Ndya #
  • 14:40 ... Back home with Ami, Ami sister & nephew... Off to SakeOne for the tour & tasting... mmmmm sake ... myloc.me/1O7rS #
  • 14:43 ... Occasionally... I want to join the Masons... #
  • 16:22 ... Sake sake sake ok I'm fine now <3 #
  • 18:40 ... Woo! Party of 24 at Yan's ! Welcome to the rare yet busy fambly reunion! myloc.me/1OiKD #
Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter

Relationship/Sex advice?

  • Nov. 30th, 2009 at 12:57 AM
Hi there, I looked through the memories a bit and couldn't really find anything that could explain what I'm going through so...here goes.
I've been dating my boyfriend for about 2 and half years and we've been sexually active with each other for 2 years. We are very close and our sex life is great--up until recent. When we first started having sex we were both virgins and he had difficulty staying hard 100% of the time, which was okay because he was new to it. After a while we got over that bridge and started learning how to please one another. We finally got the hang of it and sex was amazing. In the past five months, we found the right position for us to both orgasm during PIV sex, so that is what we have been doing a lot of.
Now, my question: Two nights ago, his parents were out of town and we had the house to ourselves. I made no insinuations to have sex but figured we would probably end up doing it. He then came onto me and we had sex for less than 3 minutes until he became soft like he used to when we first started dating. He got embarrassed and told me that he felt pressured by me to have sex with him. I assume this is because I have a higher sex drive than he does. I like to have sex about 4-5 times a week with him. I let it go and tried to forget about. Well the next night we got into foreplay (which I need a lot of to really get into it) and he could not get an erection. He was hard up until I started giving him a BJ and then he just lost it and tried to force having sex with me. He pretty much blamed it on the fact that I need a lot of foreplay.
As he was driving me home he told me he didn't want to have sex with me until he 'was ready.'

I feel almost hurt because I want to please my boyfriend and obviously what I'm doing is not working. Do you think maybe something could be up? Like he's not interested? A couple months ago he started flirting with another girl and I found out...could that have something to do with it? I just simply don't understand because we've had two awesome years of sex and all of a sudden he thinks our sex is 'too boring' and that he's 'not ready.' Does that make any sense to any of you? I would like to figure this out and any advice is greatly appreciated!

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